From the desk of Miss Know-All: Sudoku - the puzzle of the 21st Century

(Published on 30 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

Evening walks at the Independence Memorial Square are a delight. It’s a good way to assess your own competency. One does not even have to make an effort to eavesdrop as everyone talks loud enough to rattle the foundations of the beautiful monument. Poor little souls. It’s their small opportunity to get heard by the masses. The release of adrenaline does wonders to the ordinary. It’s entertaining to hear them moan about their mundane daily chores. Didn’t expect anything else from them, did we? We the Miss Know-Alls, have no time for trivial issues. Bigger and more relevant concerns need our attention. From obnoxious bosses, derby horses to monetary losses we have an answer for everything.

Did you know that Sudoku is a good way of keeping your mind agile and ticking? In fact it is even supposed to keep Alzheimer at bay. For those in the dark - Sudoku is a logic-based placement puzzle. The Daily Mirror brings us our daily dose on page 13. The aim of the puzzle is to enter a number from 1 to 9 in each cell of a 9×9 grid made up of 3×3 sub-grids. Starting with various digits given in some cells, numbers are filled in such that each row, column, and region must contain only one instance of each number.

Foxed? Not surprised dahlings! Completing the puzzle requires patience and logical ability. Interestingly Sudoku has not been around for too long. The name "Sudoku" is the Japanese abbreviation of a longer phrase, "Suuji wa dokushin ni kagiru" meaning "the digits must remain single". However, it was an American architect called Howard Garns who first designed the puzzle which was published in a U.S. puzzle magazine in 1979. The puzzle was then introduced in Japan in 1986 where it became a craze. It finally attained international popularity in 2005.

Sudoku is therapeutic and has now become an addiction. Sudoku players report an increasing sense of satisfaction as a puzzle approaches completion. A daily tonic for the mind and the soul. The first Sudoku world championship was held in Italy in March 2006 and was won by Jana Tylova, a 31-year-old accountant from the Czech Republic.

Come on, give it a shot - don’t underestimate yourself. We might have a champion amongst you. In the words of Dr Nathaniel Branden, "The tragedy is that so many people look for self-confidence and self-respect everywhere except within themselves, and so they fail in their search."

May you achieve success in your search.

Miss Know-All
wow@dailymirror.wnl.lk

Communicating Effectively

(Published on 30 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

As a teacher in one of the reputed schools of Kathmandu, I had the opportunity to interact with 16-year-old adolescents. The experience was more than gratifying, for I learnt from them, as much as they learnt from me.

The subject was Value Education. We’d often end up in very thought provoking debates. The topic for the day was ‘Understanding parents and analysing their actions.’

‘No parents are perfect,’ they told me. ‘As a child, one feels one’s parents are the epitome of virtues. But slowly, one realises, that they have their flaws and you love them, in spite of their faults.’ I listened, as words of wisdom flowed from ones so young.

‘What qualities do you feel parents should have?’ asked one, addressing the class.

‘Parents should not differentiate between a son and a daughter. They should treat them equally,’ said one, vehemently.

‘They should comfort and support the child in times of failure,’ noted another.

‘Parents should rebuke a child when necessary, but never insult their child in front of others,’ said one, with hurt and bitterness.

The debate went on … the aim being to understand the parents’ point of view. The concluding speaker, left all present in deep thought, and left me wondering how much the parents’ can learn from their own wards.

‘Parents,’ he said, ‘should be frank about their financial status. They should not keep their children in the dark, or give them the wrong impression. This would help the child to realise and know where he stands and dissuade him from making unreasonable demands.’

Probably such debates should be held in the presence of parents. I’m sure; it would enable to inculcate a healthier relationship. If there is any one secret of a successful relationship, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle, as well as from your own.

Communication is the answer to making any relationship work. Whether it is a parent, a spouse, a boss or a friend – communication is what bonds and helps build bridges. The term – ‘effective communication’ is a very broad term and can be interpreted by different people in different ways.

Effective communication skill involves a number of specific strengths. Being open to listen is one of them. There is need for children to listen to their parents and it’s even more crucial for parents to give a patient hearing to their wards. Keep the following suggestions in mind the next time you deal with your children.

# Listen openly and with empathy.

# Respond in an interested way that shows you understand the problem and your child’s concern

# Pay attention to the body language, listen between the lines

# Don't react to emotional words, but interpret their purpose

# Judge the content; comprehend before you judge

# Use multiple ways to fully comprehend (ask, repeat, rephrase, etc.) Ask for as much detail as he/she can provide; paraphrase what your child is saying to make sure you understand it and check for understanding

#Communicate your feelings but don't act them out (that is tell your child that his behaviour really upsets you; don't get angry)

#Practice supportive listening, not one way listening

That days Value Education class had a double impact on me. It taught me to communicate effectively with my son as well as with my aging mother. In today's complex world, it's even more important to make sure you set aside time to talk. That doesn't mean you have to hold a formal meeting and be formally seated. Sometimes the best discussions take place while you're driving the car or tinkering around the kitchen.

What I learnt from my teenaged students was that whether dealing with my son or my mother I should often make an effort to use phrases like - tell me more, you can do it, how can I help, let's all pitch in, how about a hug, please, thank you, good job, I love you – and above all – I need your help.

Communication is not just about getting your thoughts across – it is about doing so effectively.

Brushing up in readiness for the World Cup!

(Published on 23 May 2006 in 'Life' - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

Well it’s time to brush up your knowledge about Football because the only thing you are going to be hearing about for the next couple of weeks is the FIFA World Cup. And you don’t want to be left out of any conversation. Whether at office, social gatherings, official meetings or the confines of your home – the conversation will positively veer towards football and the current greats on the football field.

So here goes – test your knowledge and more importantly remember the answers so that you can throw in a little information and sound knowledgeable.

1) Who designed the current FIFA World Cup Trophy?

2) Where and when was the last FIFA World Cup held? Name the two teams who played the finals at the last World Cup.

3) Name the player who won the ‘adidas Golden Shoe’ for scoring the maximum number of goals in the 2002 tournament.

4) Name the player who has scored the maximum ever in a single World Cup tournament.

5) Name the first man to play in three FIFA World Cup final matches.

6) What was the biggest debacle of the 2002 World Cup?

7) Name the goalkeeper who won the ‘adidas Golden Ball’ as well as the Yashin Award for the Best Goalkeeper

8) How many teams are participating in the 2006 FIFA World Cup?

9) Name the official mascot of the 2006 FIFA World Cup?

10) Where and when is the opening match of the 2006 tournament to be held?

11) Name the two teams who will be playing the opening match of the 2006 World Cup.

12) Name the new award that will be given to the best young player who will shine the brightest at the 2006 FIFA World Cup.

13) What does the official emblem of the FIFA World Cup Germany 2006 represent?

14) What is the slogan of the 2006 FIFA World Cup Germany?

15) Name the only man to have won the World Cup both as a player and as a manager.

16) Name the current President of FIFA.

17) What is the full form of FIFA?

18) When and where was the first World Cup held?

19) Name the country that won the first World Cup. Who did they defeat in the finals?

20) What is the number of times the World Cup has been held since its inception?

Answers given below.

Answers to the FIFA World Cup Quiz 1) The FIFA World Cup Trophy is the work of Italian Artist Silvio Gazzaniga. The trophy is 36 cm high, made of solid 18-carat gold and weighs 6175 grams. The base of the Trophy bears the engraved year and name of each FIFA World Cup winner since 1974. 2) The last FIFA World Cup was held in Korea and Japan in the year 2002. Germany and Brazil played for the 2002 world championship, and it was the South Americans who won their unprecedented fifth FIFA World Cup. 3) Ronaldo from Brazil won the ‘adidas Golden shoe’ for having scored eight goals in the tournament. He was also the hero of the final match having scored both the goals in the 2-0 victory. 4) West Germany's goal machine Gerd Müller scored ten times at the Mexico 1970 tournament. 5) Brazilian captain Cafu became the first man to play in three FIFA World Cup final matches. 6) African debutantes Senegal shocked the holders France with an impressive 1-0 victory. France never really recovered from the loss, failing to escape Group A without even mustering a goal. 7) Oliver Kahn of Germany. 8) Thirty-two teams from across the globe make up the field for the 2006 FIFA World Cup. Six past winners will take part, including hosts Germany, who head the 14-strong European contingent, and holders Brazil who lead the South American challenge. 9) GOLEO VI the loveable lion is the official mascot of the 2006 FIFA World Cup. GOLEO VI's constant companion, Pille the talking football, is always at his side. 10) Munich on 9 June 2006. 11) Germany and Costa Rica. 12) The Gillette Best Young Player Award has been created to recognise the impact made by young footballers in their first FIFA World Cup. 13) The official emblem represents three smiling 'Celebrating Faces' of the 2006 FIFA World Cup. 14) The slogan of the 2006 FIFA World Cup Germany is - A Time to Make Friends 15) Franz Beckenbauer is the only man to have won the World Cup both as a player and as a manager. He was the captain of West Germany when they won the World Cup in 1974. 16) Joseph S. Blatter from Switzerland was elected as the eighth FIFA President in 1998. Blatter, who had already served FIFA in various positions for the past 23 years, was elected at the 51st FIFA Ordinary Congress in Paris. 17) Fédération Internationale de Football Association 18) The first World Cup was opened at the Centenary Stadium in Montevideo, Uruguay on 18 July 1930. 19) A total number of 13 teams participated. Uruguay won the finals defeating Argentina by 4-2. 20) Since 1930, 16 tournaments have been held. The 2006 one in Germany will be the seventeenth. (Information sourced from the official FIFA World Cup website)

From the desk of Miss Know-All :Are green tea, white tea and red tea obtained from the same plant?

(Published on 23 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

It’s wonderful to receive your fan mail. Thank you for taking out time for me from your boring monotonous lives. Spike up your day to day routine. Look for a mentor (I mean a Miss Know-All)… and things will never be dull any more.

A friend asked – if the ‘Know-All’ title was restricted only to the fairer sex. I hate to admit this one – but the world does have its fair share of Mr Know-All’s. Look around you. That ‘smart alecky’ colleague who thinks he’s God’s gift to mankind – or is it womankind! That obnoxious guy at the bar who thinks he’s a connoisseur on wines. That geek in college who rattled off formulas and the price of the oil barrel… suddenly the world seems full of my kind. The competition doesn’t ruffle me. It’s a tough world out there but I’m made of sterner stuff. From insufferable male friends to ridiculous fashion trends I have an answer for everything.

Let’s have a drink on that happy note. Iced tea anyone? Which by the way leads me on to my next question – are green tea, white tea and red tea from the same plant?

Drinking herbal teas has become a fad all over again. Green tea, white tea and red tea have become very popular over the last few years. The whole world is going gaga about their health benefits. But how are they different? Green tea and white tea come from the same plant. Like black tea they are considered ‘true’ teas. The differences in colour, flavour and antioxidant content come from differences in the harvesting and processing of the leaves. Both green tea and white tea have very mild flavours. White tea gives a very pale straw-coloured liquor and like green tea should be drunk without milk. All teas contain antioxidants that are believed to have numerous health benefits.

The teas produced in different areas have their own individual characteristics. Low-grown teas, produced at the foothills give good colour and strength but lack the distinctive flavour of the higher-grown teas. These are usually used in blending. Mid-grown teas, grown between 1,800 and 3,500 feet, are rich in flavour and give good colour. High-grown teas, from heights of between 3,500 and 7,500 feet, are the very best giving a lovely golden liquor and an intense powerful flavour.

Red tea, on the other hand, comes from a plant which grows in the mountains north of Cape Town, South Africa. Red tea has a sweeter, fruitier flavour than white and green tea and has different antioxidants than those present in green tea and white tea because it comes from a different plant.

You must be knowing that Sri Lanka is the 3rd largest tea producing country globally, and one of the world's leading exporters of tea. But did you know that the tea sector in Sri Lanka is the country's largest employer providing employment both directly and indirectly to over one million people. Let us raise a toast ( in this case - our tea cups ) in appreciation of those numerous people who help bring this morning ‘cuppa cheer’ to us every single day.

Salut! Slainte! Cheers!

Miss Know-All
wow@dailymirror.wnl.lk

PS: Salut and Slainte are Spanish and Scottish respectively for the word – Cheers! Could not leave without spreading some more light! J

Telephone Tyranny

(Published on 23 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

When I first heard the term ‘Telephone Tyranny’ – it almost felt like the doctor had finally diagnosed and given a name to an old ailment I had been suffering from, for what seemed like eternity. As per the Oxford English Dictionary – tyranny is cruel and arbitrary exercise of power or control. And that really does sum up the meaning of the expression ‘telephone tyranny’. The total control and domination of our lives by a mere instrument called a cell phone.

I hate mobile phone calls. In fact, the sound of a mobile ring tone makes me cringe and cower. While the land phone allows you your share of space and privacy – a cellular phone is an absolute tyrant! Gone are the days when you could sit by the sea watching the sunset without being rattled by an annoying ring tone. Or go for a theatre performance without a neighbour suddenly bursting into a jig trying to fish out his noisy instrument.

People almost wear their prized possessions like badges of honour on their chests hanging by a string. And the look of pride on their faces as their tiny instrument belts out the most horrendous ring tone makes my insides want to turn inside out. Ever sat at a meeting or a solemn event and had a mobile phone burst into a mindless pop song or the ‘Crazy Frog’ ring tone?

Crazy Frog is actually a character used in the marketing of a ring tone based on "The Annoying Thing", a computer animation created by Erik Wernquist. They must have known it’s annoying – why else would they name it – The Annoying Thing! The animation was originally created to accompany a sound effect produced by Daniel Malmedahl while attempting to imitate the sound of a two-stroke moped engine. Mr Wernquist and Mr Malmedahl have caused me immense pain and mental torture. They are lucky they live across the seven seas and not anywhere near where I do. Jamba!, a mobile phone content provider, based in Germany have earned an estimated £14 million from this ring tone, making it the most commercially successful ring tone of all time. What is wrong with the world? While I squirm and burrow my head under my pillow to refrain from hearing this annoying, mindless ring tone people are actually revelling in its ingenuity.

Why there is apparently a universal compulsion to answer the cell phone, under any or all circumstances is beyond me. Yes, I’ve heard cell phone calls answered in the rest room and other inappropriate places including at a solemn funeral. I have visited a public rest room, where an occupant is having an animated conversation over the mobile phone oblivious of a restless audience waiting outside for their turn. Surely the people, who engage in this, must recognise how rude the practice is. But apparently they don't, as they proceed as if the behaviour is completely appropriate and normal.

The compulsion to play with their little prized possession is so great that if not a conversation, the owner will indulge in a noisy cell phone game. This is one of my major aggravations. Ever suffered at the hands of a co passenger on a train or bus ride or at an airport or a food court? Reeling in misery, I’ve often felt like jumping in front of the running train.

The telephone is an informal medium for communication and is primarily used for short information exchanges. At least that is what Alexander Graham Bell invented it for. The poor man must be turning in his grave – regretting having created the biggest source of noise pollution ever. People seem to talk louder when they’re using cell phones. This could be attributed either to connectivity issues or the static. Also, in most cases, users are in public places and are compelled to talk louder to get heard.

The critical thing to remember about talking to someone by phone is that it’s important to let your own line remain free for urgent exchanges rather than frivolous long drawn conversations. I think voicemail is one of the greatest inventions because it enables you to accomplish the task of communicating information to someone effectively without infringing and interrupting into their personal space. Voicemail also frees us from the tyranny of the ringing telephone.

Talking about tyranny, do you realise that by giving you a cell phone your employer (or your parent if you are a teenager) have actually given you a tracking device. And God help you if you do not answer the phone when it rings. If this is not tyranny what is? Gone are the carefree days when you could get someone to tell your office that you are not at home – and hence unavailable on the phone and not contactable.

What better way to express my disgust, despair and anguish than share my solidarity with A. P. Herbert the writer of the poem ‘At the Theatre: To the Lady behind Me’. The lines below have been written to beseech all those inconsiderate beings that walk this planet to be a little more thoughtful to others around them.

At the Theatre: To the creature behind Me!

Dear Sir, you have come to see
Like all of us, the matinee
You don’t seem to be interested in the plot,
But, let me tell you, I am, a lot.
The author seeks to unfold to me
His actors’ true identity,
And you are not a friend of his
If your mobile keeps ringing the way it is.
The actors in their funny way
Have several amusing things to say,
But they do not interest me more
If you talk on your mobile just before;
The merit of the movie lies,
In an element of some surprise;
But the surprise is now very small
As, I can’t hear the dialogues at all.
The lady you have brought with you
Is, I infer, an idiot too,
She prompts you as you talk aloud
Beaming at you, foolishly proud.
In short, dumb sir, it would suit
Me just as well if you were mute;
In fact, to make my meaning plain,
I hope you will never speak again.
And may I add one final word?
Your phone’s outdated, and not much worth.

(With due apologies to A. P. Herbert the original writer of the poem ‘At the Theatre: To the Lady behind Me’)

Bloopers from the world of Advertising...

(Published on 17 May 2006 in 'Life' - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

As the country gears up to stage ‘Chillies’, the Sri Lankan Advertising Awards this week and the advertising fraternity gets together to applaud those that came out triumphant - one can’t help but acknowledge that at the end of it all it’s the customer, that is the market, that decides the fate of a campaign and further on the fate of a product or a brand.

Advertising greats have descended on the island from around the world to share their mantras on what makes a successful campaign. It would be daft for me to venture down that route as it’s the prerogative of the experts to throw light on what they know best.

However, it’s no brainer that an advertising campaign would be futile without a proper research of the market concerned. An advertising campaign is a series of advertisement messages that make up an integrated marketing communication. For the marketing communication to be effective and have an impact – it is critical that the market be surveyed and cultural as well as local sensitivities be taken on board. When launching an advertising campaign, it is not enough to understand how the product is performing. It is crucial to know how the customer is responding to the communication.

Failure to grasp the specific needs of a new market can be costly, both financially and in terms of damage to the brand image. In volatile, ever-changing markets, goof-ups can mean wasted costs in advertising, distribution and production expenses, as well as negative impact on the brand itself. Here are some advertising bloopers that have caused immense embarrassment… and which have often had irrevocable effects. Even companies with far-flung international experience have found themselves committing marketing hara-kiri.

>> Electrolux, the Scandinavian vacuum cleaner manufacturer used the following in an American campaign – ‘Nothing sucks like an Electrolux’. They failed to take into consideration the fact that ‘sucks’ had become a derogatory word in the States.

>> The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as "Ke-kou-ke-la", meaning ‘Bite the wax tadpole’ or ‘female horse stuffed with wax’, depending on the dialect. The Coke folks didn't discover what the phrase meant until after numerous signs had been printed. Not a very thirst-quenching slogan! Coke then researched 40,000 characters to find a phonetic equivalent "ko-kou-ko-le", translating into ‘happiness in the mouth’.

>> A hair products company, Clairol, introduced the ‘Mist Stick’, a curling iron, into Germany only to find out that mist is slang for manure. Not too many people were convinced and had use for the ‘manure stick’.

>> Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name of an infamous pornographic magazine.

>> Coors, the American brewer lost its fizz in Spain when their young and trendy phrase "Turn It Loose" came out as ‘Get Diarrhoea’.

>> General Motors made a marketing faux pas when they introduced the Chevrolet Nova in South America. GM was unaware that "no va" means "it won't go." After the company figured out why it wasn't selling any cars, it renamed the car in its Spanish markets as - Caribe.

>> Ford had a similar problem in Brazil with the Pinto. Pinto was Brazilian slang for ‘tiny male genitals’. Ford renamed the automobile Corcel, meaning, ‘horse’.

>> Frank Perdue's well known chicken slogan, ‘it takes a tough man to make a tender chicken’ got terribly mangled in a Spanish translation. A photo of Perdue with one of his birds appeared on billboards all over Mexico with a caption that explained "It takes a hard man to make a chicken aroused."

>> When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the same packaging as in the US, with a beautiful baby on the label. Later they learned that in Africa, companies put pictures on the label of what's inside, since most people can't read English.

>> When McDonald's launched its popular Big Mac Attack ads in Canada, there arose one problem. In Canada, ‘Big Mac’ is slang for ‘large breasts.’ Not an image McDonald's wanted to project for their sandwich.

>> In Chinese, the Kentucky Fried Chicken slogan ‘finger-lickin good" read as ‘eat your fingers off".

>> When Parker Pen marketed a ballpoint pen in Mexico, its advertisement were supposed to have read, ‘it won't leak in your pocket and embarrass you’. Instead, the company thought that the word ‘embarazar’ (to impregnate) meant to embarrass, so the advert read - ‘It won't leak in your pocket and make you pregnant’.

>> When Pepsi started a marketing campaign in Taiwan, the translation of the Pepsi slogan "Come Alive with the Pepsi Generation" came out as "Pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead."

>> In Italy, a campaign for Schweppes Tonic Water translated the name into "Schweppes Toilet Water".

>>A drug company marketed a new remedy in the United Arab Emirates. To avoid any mistakes they used pictures. The first picture was of someone ill, the next picture showed the person taking the medication, the last picture showed them looking well. What they forgot is that in the Arab world people read from right to left!

>>An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of "I saw the Pope" (el Papa), the shirts read "I saw the potato" (la papa).

~

From the desk of Ms Know-All: How does the rice cooker know when to turn off?

(Published on 16 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

Having an identity crisis? You fit into a bracket called – ‘Homo Sapiens Ignoramus.’ Perplexed? Come to Mama. As per Wikipedia, ignoramus is an ‘unknowledgeable’ person and originates from a Latin word ignoramus meaning “we do not know.” Don’t cringe. Be around in my company darlings – and a little bit of aura will rub off on you too.

Remember, your mother’s advice – “always sit next to a smart kid in class...” She was talking about me, smarty pants. From silicon implants to menopausal aunts, we, the Miss Know-Alls have an answer for everything.

And if you are left wondering how I do muster up so much information – it’s because I have a curious mind. Day to day things intrigue me. Ever looked at a rice cooker and wondered how it knows when to turn off? No rocket science here. There are a number of appliances that "know" when they should turn off. A rice cooker is just one of them.

All such appliances use the same principle. We all know that the boiling point of water is 100 degrees C. (Remember your Chemistry class back in school?) If there is boiling water in a heated container, the container will maintain a constant temperature, which is the boiling temperature of water. On cooking for sometime all the liquid water will evaporate or, as in the case of the rice cooker, it will get absorbed by the rice. The temperature inside the container immediately rises. The appliance has a thermostat that can detect when the temperature rises above the set temperature in the container, and it turns itself off.

What’s a thermostat you ask? Oh lord – I think I’ve created a monster. Simply put, a thermostat is a temperature regulator.

And now that you have started using your grey cells here’s some fodder for your brain - courtesy “Five Frogs On A Log” by Mark L Feldman & Michael F Spratt.

Five frogs are sitting on a log. Four decide to jump off. How many are left?

There are still five, honey - because there’s a difference between deciding and doing. Leave you on that thought provoking note.

Miss Know-All
wow@dailymirror.wnl.lk

!

Redefining Customer Care

(Published on 16 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

I always wondered what made my mother visit a small local grocery store in her neighbourhood rather than the big well stocked air-conditioned supermarket close by. Till I happened to accompany her one day and realised that what made all the difference was just plain customer care. The local grocer greeted her with a warm welcome, offered her a stool to sit on and a glass of water to quench her thirst, repositioned his old fashioned fan to face her, enquired after her arthritis and then fished out the stuff she had not found with him the previous week. All this to be traded for the cold greeting at the supermarket… I had never ever before realised the power of customer care as I did that particular day.

“The single most important thing to remember about any enterprise is that there are no results inside its walls. The result of a business is a satisfied customer.”- Management Guru Peter Drucker

Regardless of what business people are in, they are really in the business of satisfying customers. The degree of customer satisfaction they deliver determines the level of long-term success they will achieve in business. One small bad experience can leave an indelible impression and make a customer swear off some brands. My uncle will not visit a particular restaurant as he felt the manager was curt. My nephew won’t fly a particular airline as they misplaced his baggage. My sister won’t go to a particular salon as they nipped her toe during a pedicure and had not bothered to offer an apology. My friend won’t seek the services of a particular travel agent as they messed up her last holiday. And as for my boss, well the entire office has been made to pledge they will never ever use a particular vendor who failed to get back after a complaint was put in about service standards deteriorating.

It’s not just about making sales. It’s about creating customers - satisfied customers.
Handling customer complaints quickly and with a positive attitude is crucial to preserving a relationship with the complaining customer. Taking on board a customer’s complaint and acting on it immediately – however small or insignificant the complaint may be assures the customer that his satisfaction is foremost in the minds of the service provider. A clients’ complaint should never be underestimated, no matter how trivial it might seem. This real story happened between the customer of a well known motor car company and its customer-care executive.

The complaint received by the motor car company said, "This is the second time I have written to you, and I don't blame you for not answering me, because I sound crazy. We have a tradition in our family of ice cream for dessert after dinner each night. But the kind of ice cream varies so, every night, after we've eaten our dinner, the whole family votes on which kind of ice cream we should have and I drive down to the store to get it in the new motor I purchased from your esteemed company. The problem is that the car won’t start every time I buy a vanilla ice cream when I start back from the store. If I get any other kind of ice cream, the car starts just fine. I want you to know I'm serious about this complain, no matter how silly it sounds. What is there about your car that makes it not start when I get vanilla ice cream, and easy to start whenever I get any other kind?"

“Customers don’t expect you to be perfect. They do expect you to fix things when they go wrong.” - Donald Porter, VP British Airways

The customer-care executive was understandably unconvinced about the complaint, but sent an engineer to check it out anyway. The latter was surprised to be greeted by a well educated man in a decent neighbourhood. He had arranged to meet the customer just after dinner time. The two drove to the ice cream store. It was vanilla ice cream that night and, sure enough, after they came back to the car, it wouldn't start.

The engineer returned for three more nights. The first night, they got chocolate. The car started. The second night, the customer got strawberry. The car started. The third night he ordered vanilla. The car failed to start. The engineer, being a logical man, refused to believe that this customer's car was allergic to vanilla ice cream. He arranged, therefore, to continue his visits to get to the bottom of this problem. And toward this end he began to take notes. He jotted down all sorts of data: time of day, type of gas used, time to drive back and forth etc.In a short time, he had cracked the mystery. The customer took less time to buy vanilla than any other flavour. The answer was in the layout of the store. Vanilla, being the most popular flavour, was in a separate case at the front of the store for quick pickup. All the other flavours were kept in the back of the store at a different counter where it took considerably longer.

Now, the question for the engineer was why the car wouldn't start when it took less time. The engineer quickly came up with the answer – ‘vapour lock’. It was happening every night. But the extra time taken to get the other flavours allowed the engine to cool down sufficiently to restart. When the customer got vanilla, the engine was still too hot for the vapour lock to dissipate. Time was the problem, not the vanilla ice cream.

Even crazy looking problems are sometimes real and all problems seem to be simple only when we find the solution with logical thinking and reasoning. A customer’s complaint should never ever be ignored or considered too trivial.

“There is place in the world for any business that takes care of its customers – after the sale.” - Harvey MacKay

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From the desk of Ms Know-All: Why does the hair on your arm not grow long?

(Published on 9 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

IQ, my dear admirers is Intelligence Quotient and it indicates a person's mental abilities relative to others of approximately the same age. But IQ levels of a Miss Know-All are way above the world and his wives – age no bar! Everyone has hundreds of specific mental abilities—but we my sweeties have it in thousands.

A Miss Know-All - knows all. Period. There is no debating that one. Whether it’s something in, or something out, something hip or something hot…. we are the one-stop-shop powerhouse of information. From laddered hoses to restructured noses, we have an answer for everything.

And before you pull out your hair with frustration at the thought of not being able to keep up with my level of competency – here’s a question. Why does the hair on your arms stay short, while the hair on your head grows long? You can scratch your head. They say it helps.

Each hair on your body grows from its own individual hair follicle. Pull out one hair from your head and check out the far end. You can actually see the hair follicle at the root of the hair shaft. That’s of course if you have good eyesight like I do my dearies. Inside the follicle, new hair cells form. These new cells push older cells out of the follicle. As they are pushed out, the cells die and become the hair we see.

A follicle will produce new cells for a certain period of time. This time period called the growth phase varies depending on where the hair is located on your body. This process will stop for a period of time, and then restart after a rest phase. When the hair follicle enters the rest phase the hair shaft breaks. The existing hair falls out and a new hair takes its place. Therefore, the length of time that the hair is able to spend growing during the growth phase controls the maximum length of the hair.

The hair follicles on your head, let hair grow for years at a time, so the hair can grow very long. While, the cells that make the hairs on your arms and legs stop growing every few months. On entering the rest phase they fall off. So the hair on your arms and legs stay short. (Thank God for little mercies.)

Take care lovelies – stop staring at your hairy arms and legs in wonder and here’s some friendly advice - keep them clear off hirsute.

Miss Know-All
wow@dailymirror.wnl.lk

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Looking Beyond The Crystal Ball...

(Published on 9 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

We have always wanted to know what the future has in store for us. To have an idea of what will happen in a few hours or days is immensely desirable as it lifts the cloud of uncertainty. But gone are the days when one took help from a local soothsayer also known by various names and forms: fortune-teller, oracle, seer, astrologer and clairvoyant. In today’s competitive world there are numerous other options. Though most of the sciences mentioned below have existed for numerous years – it’s only recently that it has become fashionable to take on some of these as a career preference or a hobby.

Reading the Runes
The runic alphabets are the sacred alphabets thought to be magical in nature and containing the secrets of the universe. They have their origin in an old German language, which was used in Northern Europe. Runes have always had a magic, prophetic meaning. Rune masters used them to practice magic on somebody and cure the ill. Runes also had an important role in making prophecies. From the very beginning each of the 24 runes in the alphabet had their own name. The rune masters made their runes by carving them in a rock, wood or leather. If they were consulted about a coming event, they spread the rune stones on the ground. Only the stones which landed with the rune side up were interpreted. The rune-stones just connect you to your intuitive process. Runic alphabets are called Futharks, and are so named because the first six letters of the alphabets spell it out.

Tarot Card Reading
The Tarot is a deck of 78 picture cards that has been used for centuries to reveal hidden truths. Tarot cards have been used since before 1400 to predict the future. They are a system of symbolic images on cards. Tarot is currently also used as tool for reflection on one's personal life, as well as an aid to meditation. The cards are used to connect the user with the collective unconscious in order to get information about a person or situation. The person is asked to focus and draw out cards from a pack. With a basic three card spread, the reader can examine the past, present, and future influences on an event in your life.

Face Reading
The ancient art of face reading has been used since the time of Confucius by Chinese doctors as an aid to diagnose ailments. Close observation of the face gives a deep knowledge of the personality of the patients. The Chinese understood the concept that the face represents the energies, health and fortune of a person and they wished to live in harmony with these, and with the prevailing energies of the five elements, yin and yang, and the seasons. Each face is a map of the past, present and future. The past would be described as our inherited constitution and our early years. The present reflects our health at the time of the reading. This is something we create ourselves. The facial zones affected are related to the internal organs under stress. The future is not predestined in Chinese philosophy. Taking greater care with health can resolve possible future symptoms.

I Ching
The I Ching is an ancient Chinese text used as an oracle to find out the answer to any question. The book consists of 64 hexagrams, which is the number of possible combinations of pairs of six broken or unbroken lines (trigrams). The lines represent the two primal cosmic principles in the universe, yin (the broken lines) and yang (the unbroken lines). The trigrams represent heaven, earth, thunder, water, mountain, wind, fire, and lake. The meanings of the hexagrams were divined many years ago by Chinese philosopher-priests in tune with the tao (path). One may consult the I Ching by flipping numbered coins and adding up the numbers to determine the hexagram. Another method involves dividing up bundles of yarrow stalks.

Numerology
Numbers also help tell you the future. To use numerology, you must first decide what you want to know about. Think of a question. You must not rephrase the question afterwards - that will give you the wrong answer! Numerology is just a tool to help you focus your mind. After the question is asked, the question is decoded. There are two steps: How many words in the question? How many letters in each word? Now the numbers are reduced to a single number. The number is then interpreted. We have two categories of numbers: Odd and even. Odd numbers indicates a negative answer; even numbers indicates a positive answer. The numbers can tell you both the time it will take before the question might be fulfilled, and how good (or bad) the result will be.

Tasseomancy - Tea Leaf Reading
The art of reading tea leaves is referred to as Tasseomancy. This form of foretelling the future is strongly associated with the Gypsies and was practiced in European countries. During a reading the client drinks a cup of tea but leaves a small amount in the bottom of the cup. The person whose leaves are being read should drink the tea. The cup is then turned upside down on a saucer. The tea leaf reader picks up the cup and reads the patterns formed by the tea leaves. Various symbols have certain meanings. Time frames are estimated by the proximity of the leaves to the rim. Leaves closest to the rim represent the immediate future.


Predictions may be right or wrong as they are based on probability. But is it possible to really look into the future? That is debatable. How else can one explain the 16th century Nostradamus’ mysterious quatrains that are claimed to conceal information about future events? Do these writings actually predict the death of great people, rise of tyrants, and natural catastrophes to come? Or are the quatrains ambiguous enough that they can be interpreted to predict any occurrence. On July 1, 1566 Nostradamus offered his final prediction to his priest. In response to the priest's farewell of "Until tomorrow," Nostradamus is said to have answered: "You will not find me alive at sunrise." Nostradamus died that night.

Prediction or coincidence? You decide.

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From the desk of Miss Know-All: How your mobile phone works - By Sangeeta Rana

(Published on 2 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

How often have you stood dumb struck, impressed and overwhelmed by the sheer expanse of Miss Know-All’s knowledge and intelligence? I’ve gotten used to the adulation and the attention I get pets. Idolising someone superior is common amongst you mediocrities.

Ignorance is bliss they say – but for my tribe – having ignorant people around is bliss.Put us on a pedestal and we’ll thrive for we are God’s chosen one. Why else would He endow us and leave you all with the left-over, pretties? From bladder malfunctions to liposuctions, we have an answer for everything.

And now that you are flaunting the latest mobile phone model available in the market – let me ask you a simple question. Are you aware of how your mobile phone works? Or how sending an SMS works? Just when we finally got used to seeing everybody constantly talking on their mobile phones, it suddenly seems like no one is talking at all. Instead, they're typing away to send text messages. You belong to the ‘thumb generation’ - you should surely know how it works, you texters!

Millions of people around the world use cellular phones. You can now talk to anyone or send an SMS to anyone from just about anywhere! SMS stands for ‘short message service’. The cellular system actually functions by dividing a city into small cells(areas). Cells are normally thought of as hexagons on a big hexagonal grid. Each cell has a base station that consists of a tower. This allows extensive frequency re-use across a city. As a result millions of people can use mobile phones simultaneously.

Even if you are not talking on your cell phone, your phone is constantly exchanging information with its cell tower over a pathway called a control channel. The reason for this exchange is so that the cell phone system knows which cell (area) your phone is in, and so that your phone can change cells as you move around. When someone tries to call you, the tower sends your phone a message over the control channel that tells your phone to play its ring tone.

The control channel also provides the pathway for SMS messages. To avoid overloading the system, a 160-character maximum message size has been programmed. However, length limitations vary depending on the network, phone model and wireless carrier. Some phones don't allow you to keep typing once the 160-character limit is reached, while others will automatically break a long message you send into portions of 160 characters and deliver it in two parts or more.

Don’t tax yourselves too much darlings. Feeling snowed under? This must be an overflow of information for you… Did I mention – reading twice helps with comprehension? Until next week – keep those brain cells ticking – at least try.

Miss Know-All
wow@dailymirror.wnl.lk

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Get the fires burning... rev up your metabolism! - By Sangeeta Rana

(Published on 2 May 2006 in 'Women at Work' - W @ W - a supplement of the Daily Mirror, Colombo, Sri Lanka)

The world has blamed Napoleon for the Battle of Waterloo. And the world has blamed ‘Metabolism’ for the ‘Battle of the Bulge!’ While numerous generals down the ages have learnt from Napoleon’s mistakes not too many have been able to fathom out the intricacies and strategies that would lead them to vanquish the ‘Battle of the Bulge’.

I've blamed my metabolism my whole life without actually knowing what metabolism is all about. I’ve considered it my adversary… but have really never studied my opponent to overpower it. I finally looked for professional help. The Art of War by Sun TZu, a military genius was referred to:

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.” - Sun Tzu

Armed with this new found wisdom – I set off on a war footing pace to know a little more about this monster called METABOLISM, rather than just surrender without a fight.

The word metabolism originates from the Greek word ‘metabole’ meaning change and stands for the chemical processes in a living organism by which food is used for tissue growth or energy production. For metabolism to take place calories are burnt. Everybody’s metabolic rate varies. Metabolic rate is the amount of calories a person burns at rest, or the amount of energy his body uses to function. This brings us to a simple conclusion. To lose weight a person would need to increase his metabolic rate so that he can burn more calories than what he normally does.

Extreme dieting or inactivity can slow the calorie burn even more. However there are numerous ways one can boost up one’s metabolism. Any activity, from washing clothes to shopping, speeds up the rate at which you burn calories. The best way of course is to exercise. Not only does the exercise itself burn calories, but a good workout creates muscle, which burns calories more quickly than any other tissue.

Refrain from over calorie cutting
Extreme dieting is a definite way of not losing weight. Your body is programmed to defend your usual weight. So a drastic drop in calories from your diet will make your resting metabolic rate plummet. The answer is to consume just a little less than your regular requirement of calories a day. This will depend on your level of activity.


Eat a solid breakfast
Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Breakfast eaters lose more weight than breakfast skippers. Metabolic rate slows down while you sleep, and it doesn't get back to normal until you eat again. So if you skip breakfast, your body won't burn as many calories until lunch time. That's why it's smart to start the day with a solid breakfast.

Snack all day
It sounds strange that one should eat continually if one wants to lose weight. But eating five to six mini meals rather than three larger meals every day keeps the metabolism ticking. It will also prevent you from overeating due to hunger pangs. Not more than four hours should elapse between meals.

Pump weights
Weight training is the best way to pep up your resting metabolic rate. As you get older, your resting metabolic rate drops, but weight training can boost it right back on track once again. Muscle burns up much more calories than fat does. Regular strength training can increase your resting metabolic rate.

Break down your workouts into smaller sessions
Whenever possible, slice each of your workouts into two smaller sessions. Instead of 45 minute sessions split it into two surges of exercising. You'll burn more calories that way. Even small bursts of activity are enough to get your metabolism revved.

Pile on the protein
Getting plenty of protein can boost your metabolism, causing you to burn extra calories. Protein is made up mainly of amino acids, which are harder for your body to break down than fat and carbohydrates so you burn more calories digesting proteins. Aim to have a serving of protein, from fish, chicken, cheese, yogurt, legumes and nuts at every meal.

Say no to alcohol
Think twice before gulping down an alcoholic drink before a meal as it causes people to eat more. Drinking with dinner isn't such a good idea either. The body burns off alcohol first. This means that the calories in the rest of the meal are more likely to be stored as fat. If you must, then stick to wine, which packs fewer calories.

And say yes to milk
Load up on low-fat milk. People who consumed milk, yogurt and cheese three to four times a day lost more body fat than those who didn't. Calcium, research say, actually revs up your metabolism. Reap the largest fat-burning benefit by consuming dairy products and calcium supplement everyday.

Get enough sleep
Scrounging on sleep can slow down your metabolism. People who get four hours or less of sleep have more difficulty processing carbohydrates. When you're exhausted, your body lacks the energy to do its normal day-to-day functions, which includes burning calories. As a result metabolism automatically slows down.

De-stress and Chill out
Long term stress can make you fat. When you're perpetually stressed, your body is flooded with stress related hormones, which stimulate fat cells to increase in size and encourage fat storage. Besides, stress sparks your appetite, making you overeat.


As one grows older one’s metabolism slows down. It really does become more difficult to burn calories as efficiently as one could when one was younger. Don’t put it off for another day for until you are older. The time is now. It’s time to put the pedal to the metal and rev up your doddering metabolism.

For motivation read what Victor Hugo has to say about aging: “Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.” So whatever your metabolism rate - you are in your youth anyway!

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Lanka Woman 1 May 2006

Let flowers do all the talking...

(Published on 1 May 2006 in 'Lanka Woman' - Colombo, Sri Lanka)

At a loss for words… what better way to express your self than to say it with flowers. Flowers can express your emotions, thoughts, feelings and love for others better than anyone or anything else can ever do.

Many a beautiful story and legend is woven around flowers. According to a Roman legend, a number of suitors were keen on marrying a beautiful woman named Rodanthe, but she did not care for any of them. Despite her lack of interest, the suitors continued to woo Rodanthe so obsessively that they broke through the doors of her home. Angered by their actions and wanting to teach the suitors a lesson, the goddess Diana turned Rodanthe into a rose, and her suitors into thorns.

Another legend tells us that the Greek sun-god Helios. Helios was drowned by the Titans, and then raised to the sky, where he became the sun. He was loved by a mortal woman named Clytie, who died of her love for him. When she died she became a flower and followed Helios' daily journey through the sky. The sunflower's turning as it follows the sun symbolises her deep loyalty.

The Lotus is a very important symbol of Buddhism. It signifies the progress of the soul from the mud of materialism, through the waters of experience, and into the bright sunshine of enlightenment. An open blossom signifies full enlightenment; a closed blossom signifies the potential for enlightenment. That is why the Buddha sits on a lotus bloom. The colour of the lotus too has an important bearing. A white lotus represents the state of spiritual perfection and total mental purity. A red lotus signifies purity of the heart. It is the lotus of love, compassion, passion. A blue lotus is a symbol of the victory of the spirit over the senses, and signifies the wisdom of knowledge. A pink lotus is the supreme lotus, generally reserved for the highest deity, and thus associated with the Great Buddha.

Pink carnations have the most symbolic and historical significance. Carnations first appeared on Earth as Jesus carried the Cross. The Virgin Mary cried seeing Jesus suffer. And carnations sprang up from where her tears fell. Thus the pink carnation became the symbol of a mother's undying love and is now the emblem of Mother’s Day.

When you are in love the first thing that you think of is giving flowers to your loved one. There is a deep connection between flowers and love. Over a period of time, people have connected a specific meaning to each type of flower.

Flowers have spoken to me more than I can tell in written words. They are the hieroglyphics of angels, loved by all men for the beauty of the character, though few can decipher even fragments of their meaning. - Lydia M. Child

The world’s favourite – the rose

A rose is the most beautiful flower and no doubt everyone’s favourite. The name rose comes from the Latin word ‘rosa’, which means red. However, roses come in many different colours each of which have their own meaning. Exquisite and fragrant, the rose is the messenger of love. Besides, a rose teaches us life’s bitter lesson. It shows us how to stay beautiful and spread love and compassion even while living amidst thorns.


mRed roses - signify passion, romance and sensual love. Can also be given to convey congratulations on a job well done.

mPink roses - signify friendship, elegance and gentleness. Pink has long been associated with partnership and marriage.

mPeach roses - signify desire and excitement. The feelings expressed convey: anxious build up of love and a hurry to catch the romance.

mWhite roses - signify innocence and secrecy. The feelings expressed convey: purity and youthfulness.

mYellow roses - signify friendship, respect and gratitude. The feelings expressed convey: welcome back, remember me

mWhite and red roses together – signify unity.

mRed and yellow roses together - convey congratulations.

mYellow and orange roses together - imply passionate thoughts.


The colour of the rose is not all that matters – the next big question is the number! Confused as to how many roses to give - well read on.

1 rose denotes ‘Eternal love’
2 roses denote 'A commitment’
3 roses denote 'I Love You'.
7 roses denote 'I'm madly in love with you'.
10 roses denote 'You are mine'.
11 roses denote 'You are my treasured one'.
12 roses denote 'Promise to be always by your side'
13 roses denote 'We will be friends forever'.
15 roses denote 'I'm really sorry...'
20 roses denote 'I will be always faithful to you'
21 roses denote 'I'm committed to you'
36 roses denote 'I'll remember our romantic moments for as long as I live'
40 roses denote 'I love you with all my heart'
99 roses denote 'I'll love you till the day I die'
100 roses denote 'I will never leave you'
101 roses denote 'You are my one and only'
108 roses denote 'Will you marry me?'
999 roses denote 'My love will last till the end of time'


A morning glory at my window satisfies me more than the metaphysics of books. – Walt Whitman


Carnations
Carnations signify fascination and love. In particular, pink carnations are used for saying "I will never forget you" while red carnations express admiration and love. White carnations are ideal for wishing good luck.

Chrysanthemum
Chrysanthemum is used to express friendship. Yellow chrysanthemum denotes friendship teamed with love and white chrysanthemum is used to denote truth. Red is also used to express love, good luck and best wishes.

Daffodil
The daffodil flowers in Spring - when the sun begins to shine. Thus this flower expresses the happiness one experiences in the presence of one’s loved one as if to say “the sun is always shinning when I’m with you”.

Gladiolus
Gladioli denote sincerity. Derived from the Latin word meaning “sword”, it expresses infatuation, telling the receiver that he or she "pierces the heart like a sword would."


Flowers are a proud assertion that a ray of beauty out-values all the utilities of the world. - Ralph Waldo Emerson


Iris
An iris denotes the importance of friendship, help and faith.

Lily
Lilies denote the purity of the heart. While lilies come in a variety of colours, most people readily associate lilies with white, meaning innocence and sweetness. Yellow lilies express gratitude and happiness.

Tulip
Tulips are used as a declaration of love; a gift from a "perfect lover." Red tulips indicate an irresistible love, while yellow tulips denote a hopeless love with no chance of reconciliation.

Sunflower
The sunflower promises power, warmth, and nourishment — all the attributes of the sun.

Zinnia
The zinnia means 'I miss you very much' and teamed with roses can make a beautiful combination.


A flowerless room is a soulless room, to my way of thinking; but even one solitary little vase of a living flower may redeem it. - Vita Sackville-West


Irrespective of what a particular type of flower denotes – flowers always fill my heart with love and compassion. An offering of a flower at the altar seems like the ultimate expression of love and devotion for the Creator.

Roses may be the world’s favourite flower… as for me I would like to end with the words of Edward Paul Abbey – ‘For myself I hold no preferences among flowers, so long as they are wild, free, spontaneous.’

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Ten reasons I hate my spouse... - By Sangeeta Rana

(Published on 1 May 2006 in 'Lanka Woman' - Colombo, Sri Lanka)

The above statement is bound to draw a lot of attention. It takes courage and fortitude to come out in the open. I’ve kept it under covers for years but the claustrophobia is killing me… and it’s time I let the world know.

While my old aunts are going to chuckle and their better halves (read bitter halves) going to shake their heads in disbelief - here it is… finally in black and white for the world to savour.

Mr Right! This one is addressed straight to you.

01) For heavens… stop being nice to my friends. I am finding it arduous to be nice to all of yours.

02) Peter out! Stop being such a terrific Dad. I’m finding it difficult to keep up with the high standards you are setting.

03) Cease having such a good sense of humour. Aren't we supposed to take our marriage a little more seriously?

04) Put an end to telling me everyday that you love me. I feel the need to work harder on looking better for you.

05) Cut encouraging me to take care of my health. There’s no point taking life too seriously. Is there? You can't come out of it alive anyway.

06) Curtail from pampering me silly with expensive gifts. The guilt is killing me… and if you must can I do the selecting!

07) Discontinue from keeping my picture on your office desk. I don't have the best figure in town – gosh and to have it on display!

08) Resist from placing me on a pedestal. It's unhealthy. I'm putting on weight due to the lack of exercise!

09) Bring to a halt perpetually adjusting with my needs. As per marriage counsellors it is unnatural to be in perfect sync.

10) STOP being such a perfect husband. I feel left out when other women sit and whine about their 'significant others' - or is it 'insignificant others?'

Why can’t you, like the millions around you - just be a normal Asian husband!

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